


Storybrooke Vice

by snidgetsafan



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-08
Updated: 2018-05-08
Packaged: 2019-05-04 04:47:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 639
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14585271
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snidgetsafan/pseuds/snidgetsafan
Summary: After all the big villains have been dealt with, the Sheriff (and especially her Deputy) have to deal with the hardened criminal core of Storybrooke.





	Storybrooke Vice

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by [ this post](http://whimsicallyenchantedrose.tumblr.com/post/171632279263/so-big-bad-villains-may-be-a-thing-of-the-past) on Tumblr

   “Right, I expect exemplary behavior from you young ladies from now on, do you hear me?” Killian said, as he opened the cell door to let their most hardened criminals out.

   Giggles answered him and he fought to control his smile, trying to look stern, especially as Angie, leader of the oldest gang in Storybrooke, batted her eyelashes at him as she passed.

   Once all five runaways were out, Killian closed the door and went to join his wife, who didn’t bother to hide her smile as she made the five women sign the release paperwork. As he passed near them, he startled as he felt a pinch on his butt cheek followed by a flurry of giggles. Turning around, he mock seriously asked, “Who wants to add assault to their already charged record, hm?”

   “It depends, Deputy, will it mean you have to carry out a body-search? Because if you have to, I confess to _everything_ you want to charge me with,” Angie said to the delight of her friends, who squealed in glee.

   Killian pinched the bridge of his nose. _What had he expected, really?_ “No, no body-search, Angie,” he said. “Now, if you ladies are finished, your guardian is waiting for you outside.” A chorus of groans welcomed his words.

   “Do we have to?” whined Isabella, who was usually the quietest.

   Emma chose that moment to intervene. “I’m afraid so, girls, you know the rules.” 

   “We know the truth, Sheriff, you just want to keep this hunk of a man to yourself,” said Angie, wagging her finger at her.

   Smiling widely, Emma nodded, “You’re right, I know I can’t compete with you, have to make sure none of you steal him from me.”

   The women giggled again while Killian circled the desk and went to stand next to his Swan, far from any wandering fingers. “Now ladies, you know we are not meant to be. Despite my youthful looks, I am far too old for you.”

   Protests rose from the five ladies until Rose, the youngest member of the group, blurted out, “But it’s exactly those looks that interest us, Deputy Jones, you can leave the rest to your wife.”

   “Alright, alright now,” said Emma, laughing. “Time to go, girls. And I don’t want to see you here again until at least next month, you hear me?” she said, corralling them towards the street where their harassed-looking carer was waiting impatiently in front of a van marked with the inscription “Sunny Point Retirement Home.”

 

   Once the five elderly ladies were settled and had finished blowing kisses to Killian, the van departed and the sheriff and her deputy went back inside the station, arm in arm.

   “How long do you think until we see them again, love?” Killian asked, looking down at his wife.

   “At most? Five days. You know they can’t live without their Deputy Cutie for long,” Emma said, looking at him mischievously.

   Killian groaned. They had called him this _once_ , but Emma had never let it go.

   His wife looked at him, chuckling, “At least, these encounters prove one thing.”

   “What’s that, Swan?”

   “That even when I’m old and grey, you’ll still find me attractive.”

   Killian smiled, embracing her. “You know you’ll always be the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen, Swan, whatever your age,” he said, kissing her softly.

   “Good,” she answered.

   “And what about me, Swan? Will you still love me in a few decades, when I’m not as dashingly handsome as I am now?”

   “Oh babe, you forget I already know what you’re going to look like in thirty years’ time,” Emma said, stepping back from his arms, patting his chest.

   “And?”

   “Well, I saw you and I still married you, now _that_ ’s a proof of love if there ever was one,” Emma said, walking quickly towards her office.

   “Oi!”


End file.
